spectating participant

March 27, 2002


Filed under: unlisted — suzanne henderson @ 12:00 am

11 hours of sleep really puts me in a cheery mood. Don’t know if I was just exhausted from my trip or if taking a full day’s worth of meds at once really knocked me out. Whatever it was, I didn’t mind. Only woke up once when my phone rang, I will admit that I can’t remember a word of the conversation, but I am sure it was probably enjoyable. Feeling much better this morning, rested and ready to work on a million things at once. Perhaps it was this dream I had. It basically seemed like Moulin Rouge on acid. Sprinkle in odd references to mashed potatoes, costumes, and tomatoes and it is almost a typical dream. The cast consisted mostly of my family members, many of my friends, and the occasional stranger added in for good measure. The costumes were spectacular. My mom even let me have a few of the slutty ones; too bad it was only a dream. I had to hit snooze four times just to finish the dream. But at least it wasn’t one of those mornings where I’m slapping snooze just to get a little more sleep.
Enough chatting on about sleep. Better kick my butt into gear and actually get to class on time since I am awake on time. Must get some designs for the Professional Writing web project online today. Busy. Busy. Busy.

March 26, 2002


Filed under: unlisted — suzanne henderson @ 12:00 am

Brrrr. It is cold. I actually managed to get a writing draft completed on time for a change. After spending my evening using up free minutes, I decided that sleep sounded better than writing (sound familiar?). I set my alarm for an hour earlier so that I could get the paper done before class (sounded like a good plan then). Then morning rolls around, the alarm starts buzzing, and I start wishing that I had gone to bed earlier. I check then time and think, “Why am I getting up so early? I can sleep for another hour before I need to be up.” I fall back into my pillow and head back to dreams. 9 minutes later, “beep beep beep” going off again and I still don’t want to be up. After 30 minutes of alarm-interupted-delay, I finally remember that I have a paper that needs to be finished, shit.
Crawled out of bed, into my shower that I had missed during my vacation. Grabbed my favorite soap, that I had also missed, and slowly woke up. Dried off the best I could and headed out to computer, typical morning routine. It’s amazing how fast ideas come to you when your sitting in a cold living room with wet hair and armed with only a towel. I had that paper finished in no time, and then I dissapeared off to my blankets for another thirty minute nap. Ah, wonderful to have managed to get everything done and still steal a few glimpses of sleep.
But now class has been over for a few hours. Design ideas are not coming to me, but I keep trying. And my tummy is wanting some mac & cheese. My mom wants me to come over for a fitting this evening, so I will prolly grab a munchkin, grab late-lunch/early-dinner, and head over there. Also going with her to an auction tomorrow too, 3 nights in a row, won’t she be happy. Tally up those brownie points for a wonderful weekend up at DR with wonderful company.

March 25, 2002


Filed under: unlisted — suzanne henderson @ 12:00 am

Vacation over.
Resume life.
Work. Work. Work.
It feels as though everything needs done at the same time. Everything needs worked on. Everything needs attention. And I’m still tired. Exhausted, actually. The drive home was shorter, but the frisky slips in the snow made it far more stressful than the drive there. But, I made it home alive.
I seemed to have forgotten to pack my smile. Morning came the same as it always does here, cold and blank. Mumbling that the alarm was going off didn’t prompt you to get up and hit snooze. The warmth of the blanket didn’t bring the same comfort as your arms did the mornings before. I feel like I’m walking around some where I’ve only been to in dreams. Campus doesn’t feel real to me anymore. Milwaukee seems like my cruel imagination keeping me 900 miles away from where I want to be right now.

March 16, 2002


Filed under: unlisted — suzanne henderson @ 12:00 am

CST that is! For anyone who might get a touch confused why I am always running an hour behind for the next week. I made it to Baltimore in one swoop. And what a swoop that was. I left my home about 7:40am and got in town around 10:00pm.
That was a lot of driving. I don’t think that I will ever want to make that trip again. I am dreading the fact that I will have to make that same trip to go back home. But that I might be able to break into smaller chunks while taking a break in the middle to sleep. DOn’t know yet what I will be doing, I will jut have to wait and see.
Having a wonderful time on vacation, enjoying every minute of it. And can’t wait to see what happens tomorrow. But I am still recovering from the long drive and a full day spent in Washington DC. So I am going to get some more sleep.

March 13, 2002


Filed under: unlisted — suzanne henderson @ 12:00 am

Another reason I love Milwaukee: St. Patrick’s Day Riverwest Pub Crawl for Children’s Charity. I read it in the Shepherd and will get the link up as soon as they update their page. (They can be a little slow sometimes.)

University of Wisconsin System has placed a hiring freeze on all faculty and staff. I am not too surprised since so many other state agencies across the country have done the same. But it sure puts another kink in my search for employment, bummer.

More university news: The University of Wisconsin System Board of Regents voted Friday (March 8) to suspend any further undergraduate admissions at all 26 campuses, pending additional information on proposed cuts to the UW budget. UW-Milwaukee seems to be working on a response.

March 12, 2002


Filed under: unlisted — suzanne henderson @ 12:00 am

I was running late this morning (what’s new?) and had to park on campus. After class, I hopped in my car and head for the bus stop. But, a few random ideas snuck into my head before I made it there. I so found my self in the middle of a major detour taking me to the Southside of Milwaukee. Before I knew it, I was browsing in a store. I spent a while there, debating on several different purchases, but unfortunately, logic got the better of me and I passed up on several items.

Having wasted a good hour, lunchtime was upon me and I traveled on to Oscars for a burger and malt. And now it is proven, without a doubt, that Kopps has the best cheeseburgers in Milwaukee and Culvers has the best chocolate malts. Oscars might as well go out of business because it sure wasn’t worth if 5 dollars I spent for lunch.

Since I was on the Southside and far enough West to stop at Mayfair Mall, I figured I would make one last stop. I just so happened to have a 15 dollar gift certificate for a trixie shop. I paused for a few moments to hit the tech section of Barnes & Noble and then ran over to Express. I never realized that it could be so painful to spend 15 dollars. Maybe I simply have no sense of fashion, but most of the clothes looked way too formal and uncomfortable. I finally picked out a couple star necklaces and hurried over to the check out. But, as luck would have it, accessories were not included (read the fine print). Damn. To hell with it, I decided, and headed back to campus and started a game of chance with the parking police.

March 7, 2002


Filed under: unlisted — suzanne henderson @ 12:00 am

It sucks when your apartment neighbor decides to take a shower at 2am. The slumbering, quiet of the building is destroyed by squeaky faucets and gushing pipes. Then, at 2am mind you, your neighbor has the nerve to burst out singing songs from the musical Oliver. All the while, your light slumber is interrupted by the rhythm of the water hitting the tub and the somewhat off-note rendition of “Who will Buy.” After finishing off several songs, many which seemed to be cut off mid-note, the water stops and you think you are going to get to go back to sleep. The faint clink of the shower curtain rings fades off into the night and you drift back into sleep. But wait, it seems that sleep is not an option because your squeaky-clean neighbor has decided to turn on the radio. Due to the noises coming from next door, your neighbor is trying the dance-dry method. You check the clock once more, reminding yourself that it is almost 3am now. You curse the walls and start thinking about when you are going to finally buy that house.
Yeah, that must suck. Good thing I’m the neighbor.

March 6, 2002


Filed under: unlisted — suzanne henderson @ 12:00 am

Chai and Lithium: the perfect beginning to any day. I don’t count the past 4.75 hours to be part of this day. Those groggy moments of morning when I managed to shuffle through a shower and into my clothes was simple an extension of sleep. The time spent getting out the door, down the highway, and onto campus was simply my commute. And this morning’s date with a sharp object and cotton ball was no way to start a day. And the ASL class served as a prelude to Chai and Lithium.

I want to be a dj. This desire has been spinning through my mind for a while now; ever since BobbyG bought some turntables. I am almost ready to go out and buy some vinyl, but I really want to do cd mixes instead. Perhaps I can talk to Elad and see if I can get a mini-lesson (if there is such a thing) and do a little spinning out in Baltimore. I also want to take Bobby up on the poetry mix idea… speaking of which, I need to email him.

I have been unable to get motivated or focused on anything lately. I have some major projects sitting over my head and I still can’t get started. Where are those all nighters in the computer lab? Where are the code-till-you-drop moments? Instead, I have this nagging desire to redo the entire xixstar format. But doing so will require tons of time that I don’t think that I have. And in the meantime, there are overdue papers and a still incomplete ticketing system waiting for me. Argh. Where is my motivation?

March 2, 2002


Filed under: unlisted — suzanne henderson @ 12:00 am

What am I doing going to a Woman’s Leadership Conference? I have never been involved with girl
groups on campus. I don’t play an active or influential role at this university. The closest I’ve come to female activi
sm was when one of the leaders of the college feminists group used to teach part time in my daughter’s classroom.

So why did I give up an entire weekend to hand out at some conference? Guess it just sounded like the thing to do. More s
pecifically, it sounded like the college thing to do. I have spent four semesters at UWM and
still know nothing about the student body. Of course, UWM is a ‘commuter’ campus and student involvement outside of classes
is almost non-existent. Even so, I would hope that after two years here that I would have met a few people and discovered som
e sense of community. So, in some odd attempt to make use of my final year, I am going to start doing college things.

So, I woke up on time, resisted the typical urge to hit snooze a
few times, and started packing. I managed to cram all the necessities into a small, old-fashioned suitcase-this suitcase has
been giving me ideas. It is time either to submit it to a variety of stickers or to paint it. I can’t decide which would add
more character (which already has a lot of). Perhaps I will find a way to do both-but enough of that mental detour.

I have to meet the other conference attendees on campus at 11:30am. We will then get carted up (or is it over) to "http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=River+Falls+Wisconsin">River Falls, register for the conference, and get our room as
signments. I am going to work hard on my social skills and hopefully end up with a few new friends at the end of the weekend.

Until then, I’m going to enjoy my chai and observe the other Fuel customers. This reminds me, I still need to get part two of my quest for chai online.

March 1, 2002


Filed under: unlisted — suzanne henderson @ 12:00 am


I did a self portrait photo shoot a few nights ago. Taking pictures of yourself, without a tripod, isn’t as easy as I thought it would be. Even with only a few good shots, I am almost inspired enough to ask a certain photographer for a photo shoot, but of course, only after my favorite photographer gets a chance. Here is one image that I liked, I will get a few more online as soon as I get a new site design done.

Sometimes I forget how much fun childhood can be. Yesterday, instead of working on assignments, I spent the evening rolling around on the floor with my daughter. I remembered what it is like to play make believe (I was a horse) and to just be silly. I’m afraid that my downstairs neighbor may have thought a herd of elephants was about to fall through her ceiling, but at least it would have been a happy herd. And I am sure our laughter spilled out into the hallway. I think that all of my school work and projects have been causing me to miss out on some of the finer points of parenting. Yesterday, I got the perfect wake up call.

While goofing off, we decided to plan out our spring vacation. We pulled out a map to trace the route we would drive on the way to Baltimore. We scanned several Family Fun magazines for exciting side-trips. We also worked out what snacks and games we should take along in the car. Alex is excited about the trip and I can’t wait to have a whole week to spend with her (no assignments, no projects, nothing else getting in the way).

Tonight, we had to venture off to the laundry mat. Normally, I cart along my back pack and various asignments that I need to work on. But tonight I brought along a box of crayons and some geometric patterns to color. Alex and I passed the time figuring out what colors to use and which patterns we wanted to make. Our clothes were washed and dried in record time. We didn’t get the pages finished, but we did decide that we should make this part of the laundry routine.